Mid-fight, a racing heart can shut down your listening.

When an argument heats up and your heart races past about 100 beats a minute, your body switches into alarm mode and you stop really hearing the other person. Pushing on with better words only makes it worse. A short break to calm down, then coming back, does more than any perfect comeback.

Try today: Next time things heat up, say, "Give me twenty minutes." Then come back calm.